The Roof Over My Head And The Chip On My Shoulder

I’m a spoilt brat. By my own doing of course. I live in a very cool studio apartment in what is known as Bombay’s Manhattan– Sandra from Bandra. Pleased to meet you.

My pad is fully furnished with a table and wardrobe set that has the most divine shade of Bournville Brown (yes I’ve earned it), fridge, air conditioning, bathroom, kitchen, dining table studded with well cushioned chairs, TV, generous plug points, washing machine, a sepia toned lamp that outshines the 3 unnecessary tube-lights, a sofa cum bed and ample shelves for storage!  All I had to do to personalize the space was hang a disco ball and stick all 14 pages of HOWL on the barren walls.

The neighbourhood is even more convenient. My house is wedged between the 2 most popular streets- Hill Road and Chapel Road. A saloon is literally 20 yards away. Once I have treated myself to the good old hair removal routine, I can head over to the Birdsong Café – a very “New York, New York” joint that can be afforded only by hipster beatniks like yours truly. Groceries and kirana stores populate the Bazaar Road nearby. Heck an ATM and my broker’s office are joint at the hip down the road! My office is a minimum rickshaw fare of Rs. 15 away and so are all the bars, restaurants, cafes and sea facing views. *Sigh* Everything tailor made for my lazy arse. I would post pictures of this heaven on earth, but

A). I am a private individual very different from the photo-hogging-selfie-taking-foursquare-checking-in-social media junkies.

B). I have no interest in inviting you to cast your evil eye on me and my fortune!

I have warmed this abode for over half a year now and what with my euro trip plans for 2015- mommy gotta save some cash a.k.a rent money. And so started the house hunting spree with a heavy heart! Suspect brokers and Facebook leads took me for a ride through the gullies of Bandra- ones I had nonchalantly overlooked all this while.  I was repelled. <Read with a Frenchman’s accent> How can people live in such 3rd world conditions?</end accent>

At this point one broker flatly remarked- <Read with mumbaiya twang> “Madem agar paise bachane ka hai, tho compromise tho karnaich padega!” (If you want to save money, then you gotta compromise gurl!). I had to go back home and look that word up in the dictionary. #NoWayJose.

Maybe if I shack up with like-minded girls in a 2 or 3 BHK – with my own room and attached bathroom of course… Perhaps that could work within my budget? Yeah right. Only if I could be cool with a room with no windows; or a house built by an architect who failed the exam on Vastu Shastra; or a pad that has everything going for it except the orthodox owner keeping a hawk eye on the tenant from the apartment across the corridor!

All that was more than enough to reaffirm my faith and belief in “living large”. Thank You Vijay Mallya. I just pray I don’t go broke like you in a few years! So basically, to make a long story even longer- I am staying put!

Off to another adventure figuring out how to grow the Euro Trip Fund…

To be continued…